I experience a constant inner conflict between remaining in London or embarking on an adventure to another European city.
During the weekdays, my routine consists of attending classes, studying in cafes, and exploring the vibrant city of London. However, on weekends, there is a persistent urge within me to seek out new experiences elsewhere.
London has always held a special place in my heart, stemming from my early fascination with the city depicted in literature and my eventual disenchantment with my home country. Yet, since commencing my study abroad program here, I have started to overlook its charms.
London has evolved into a familiar setting, where I navigate the streets with ease, whether it’s a trip to the local market or a leisurely stroll along the river. While discovering new eateries and neighborhoods still excites me, I have noticed a sense of detachment creeping in.
I find myself pondering whether I should be pursuing more significant adventures. Should I be socializing more? Traveling to new destinations? Or should my primary focus be on academic pursuits during this study abroad experience?
These questions began to surface around two weeks ago during the UK’s version of spring break, known as reading week. During that period, I embarked on a memorable journey to Iceland and Scotland with my flatmates and a few close friends.
Iceland’s breathtaking landscapes, featuring glaciers and cascading waterfalls, left me in awe. The experience of driving through the country, with its unfamiliar road rules and occasional challenges, was both exhilarating and nerve-wracking. Our road trip, complete with a rented car named Bjorn, was a memorable adventure, despite minor mishaps like running out of windshield fluid.
In contrast, Scotland, particularly Edinburgh, exuded a gothic ambiance intertwined with lush greenery—a refreshing change from the urban landscape of London. Exploring the Scottish Highlands and encountering the iconic fluffy cows added a unique charm to the trip.
Upon returning to London, I anticipated resuming my usual activities—visiting the National Gallery, browsing local bookstores, and catching up on academic tasks. However, when my flatmates departed for Barcelona and subsequent weekend getaways, I faced a dilemma.
Despite being invited to join them for a birthday celebration in Barcelona, I felt compelled to stay in London to reconnect with the city I had chosen as my study abroad destination.
The internal debate over whether to seize the opportunity to travel persisted until the eleventh hour, fueled by a fear of missing out on shared experiences. Ultimately, opting to prioritize self-care and introspection over FOMO, I decided to remain in London.
Reflecting on this decision post-weekend, I realized the importance of striking a balance and savoring moments of solitude. While my inclination has always been to pack my schedule with endless activities, I am now striving to appreciate the present and avoid future regrets regarding my time in London.
Although it is impractical to visit every European country within a six-month timeframe, fully exploring the vast city of London is equally unattainable. I acknowledge the privilege of knowing that this study abroad experience is not my sole opportunity to traverse Europe and revisit cherished destinations.
Yet, the lingering question persists, echoing the sentiments of The Clash’s iconic song—should I stay or should I go?